Book Review: "In Their Own Voices" by Rita Simon and Rhonda Roorda

This book is about trans-racial adoption; specifically, it is about the perspective of trans-racial adoptees in America. The book begins with various statistical evidence which demonstrates that trans-racially adopted individuals are as healthy and well-adjusted as other (same-race) adoptees. However, the authors also deal with the argument promoted by some in the African American community that trans-racial adoption of a black child into a white family is not only harmful to the child, but is detrimental to the black community. In fact, the term used over and over again is “genocide” when referring to the effects of trans-racial adoption on the African American culture. The authors attempt to gain insight into the lives, experiences, and emotions of adults who were adopted trans-racially in the 60’s and 70’s. They seek responses from the adoptees to the growing concern of many in the African American community who fear the consequences of trans-racial adoption for the community and the child.
I received so much from this book in terms of gaining an understanding of the perspectives of the black community, the effects of racism, the various and unique issues of a trans-racially adopted child, and the responsibilities that many adoptive parents seem to overlook. In terms of the perspectives of the black community, it is interesting to me that many are not in favor of trans-racial adoption because they feel the child is being stripped from their cultural roots. Others fear that the fabric of the black community is being eroded further by white people who are already dominating every facet of society and now even the black youth are being diluted through adoption. Although I obviously do not agree with these perspectives wholly, I do understand the concerns and I will be able to address them more intelligently now. An adoptive parent can be more proactive in addressing these concerns through exposing the child to his or her culture of origin, by connecting with others in the black community who can serve as positive role models and mentors for their child, and by celebrating the cultural differences rather than ignoring them or avoiding them.
Regarding the effects of racism, I am much more sensitive now to the probable future difficulties of my child than I was before reading this book. Before, I had adopted the notion that “love conquers all” and I believed that my daughter would not suffer the effects of racism because our love would shield her from these bad things. I now know, through reading these adoptees’ accounts of their lives, that racism is alive and well and my daughter will most likely encounter racial slurs, ugly speech and glances, unfair social and business practices and other reprehensible behavior from people of both races and all ages. She may be discriminated against at a very young age. Again, the parents’ responsibility comes into focus: we must prepare our children for the world, both good and bad. Racism must be dealt with head-on if we want our children to thrive.
Finally, the most important knowledge I received from this book is that often trans-racially adopted children feel out of place, even with their own families and uncomfortable in their own bodies. A feeling that something is “missing” seems to have followed many of these children into adulthood. Parents need to be aware of this and foster open communication with their children, especially during adolescence when this feeling often emerges. Although I no longer feel that love is all we will need to raise our children well, I also believe in the words our Lord gave us more than ever: “Love covers a multitude of sins.”